Sterling Update

November 1999
By a Sterling observer

Arthur Kasarjian (now Justin Sterling) started the Sterling Institute of Relationship (SIR) and has full control of the Weekends (both men's and women's). Recently the SIR has had some rather substantial problems, Justin's number one man and woman who have fallen out of the SIR — seemingly going in a "different direction". These two people were the co-leaders (second in command) of the Weekends.

The SIR formed two organizations Men's Division (MD) and the Family of Women (FOW). It appears as if the members believe these groups are autonomous. However, the truth is that Justin Sterling appears to have and will probably always have control over these groups. Recently the FOW has had a major shakeup when the SIR's leadership broke off; many of the FOW leaders left the organization.

Several organizations have spun off from the Men's Division--such as the Nation of Men (NOM) and the most recent, The Line. The NOM and The Line may have had some philosophical differences with SIR.

The Family of Women and the Men's Division supply the volunteer teams to support the Men's and Women's Weekends. The team leaders are equal counterparts of men and women. Various team names are CORE, MA, Production, Strike, PTM, AV, etc. This is where the phone calls are generated along with additional weekly meetings. The phone calls are called "clearing calls"--each of which seems to last for about 45 minutes and are often at inconvenient times. If you are late to call (within seconds) the call must be rescheduled, no matter what the problem may have been. The workers must be 100% committed to the Weekend and nothing can distract them from their "commitment."--they agree to oaths that give up many rights they have as individuals for the "Higher Purpose".

The team members must agree:

• "to be on time at the designated place at the designated time, ready to go"

• "to do whatever is required of me in order to produce the result of the Weekend, and to produce it instantly, with no confusion"

• "to honor and respect the chain of command--no matter what"

• "to volunteer until completion"

These are only a set of examples of the terms a team member must agree to. Everything must also be done in complete secrecy. "Confidentiality" is crucial to success of the Weekend. If the volunteer does not abide by all of the rules, they will fail and be "kicked off the team." They will also be chastised for their failure with statements like, "Is this the way you want your relationships to be?" This means that SIR comes first and all others (family, friends, school, and work) come last.

The marketing department (MD and FOW) brings in the participants of the Weekend. Officially anyone who has taken the Weekend can send someone to the Men's or Women's Weekend. The NOM and The Line are able to send men /women to the appropriate Weekend. Within the MD and FOW members are trained to find candidates and bring them (with their $600 fee) to the Weekends. The FOW / MD does not seem willing to accept NO for an answer.

To avoid the Weekend once invited, you must be very stern in your rejection of their offer. These groups have been highly trained at breaking down the walls of resistance--do not underestimate their ability or determination. They will not divulge any information (secrecy/confidentiality) about the Weekend, other than "it will change your life forever." If they were to tell the candidate anything, in their minds the candidate might not receive the full benefit of the Weekend. In other words the candidate would not go. The marketing approach of this group is done with statements similar to "trust your sponsor", "trust the men/women," "trust the process," and/or --"your relationships deserve what you will receive."

But trust your instincts instead and just say NO.

Another Sterling Weekend which concerns me perhaps more than the other Weekends--is the Young Women's Weekend. This is a Weekend (similar to Justin's) for minors. These Weekends are operated and controlled by the FOW. The FOW have presented this Weekend at least three times and plan to continue these Weekends. These young women are highly impressionable and vulnerable to this sort influence. As a parent I would never allow my child to attend this type of activity. I urge any parent confronted with a release form (allowing your child to attend)--PLEASE DO NOT SIGN THE FORM. If your child does not have issues, they may when the Weekend is over. If your child has issues already, the FOW will likely add more. If these Young Women's Weekends are allowed to continue we will have families raised with this mindset--this can only degrade our society's values and women's self-worth [sic]. There are much more appropriate organizations in which children can be mentored. Please find a more appropriate opportunity for your children.

The International Community Service Day (ICSD) is closely tied to SIR, though it is reported to be a separate entity--it actually appears to not be functionally. FOW and MD supply the leaders for this organization. The teams have a similar structure to the Weekends. It also appears that the organization operates from the SIR headquarters. A majority of the MD and FOW members attend each ICSD. Every member of the FOW and MD must attend two days of ICSD a year to be a participant in either group. The more you volunteer and/or become involved, the higher in leadership you can go (also the more time you will loose and more control the SIR will have over your life). The ICSD seems to be an attempt for SIR to validate itself through what can be seen as public relations effort. The FOW and MD to recruit new members for the Weekend unofficially use the ICSD. The FOW and MD potential recruits are member of the PTA, School Board and the community of volunteers aiding in the ICSD's projects. Again, this is not an official activity for the ICSD, but SIR has filled these events with its highly trained marketing people.

In reading aricles on the ICSD, it amazes me that any community or school board would have anything to do with such an organization. The "ends do not justify the means." There are many other qualified volunteer organizations that can be utilized to fulfill these needs in our society without the obvious problems posed by seemingly self-interested and questionable groups with possible hidden agendas (such as the ICSD/ SIR).

Apparently Justin Sterling (a.k.a. Arthur Kasarjian) has successfully fulfilled his "Higher Purpose." That is it appears--to control a group of people and bring in a healthy cash flow, which he personally benefits from. He has done this largely with volunteers--that keeps overhead very low. Most of the Sterling money goes to Justin. He has also given his creation a friendly face with the ICSD.

The members of the FOW and MD are something like a self-improvement feeding frenzy. Justin Sterling seems to controls the groups with a combination of techniques, ranging from guilt, shame, personal degradation, judgment, confidentiality/secrecy and of course the "Higher Purpose." He works this through a false seeming sense of "honor," which often leaves members with no alternative but to submit and do his bidding.

If Justin Sterling was given such higher relationship knowledge, why was he unable to use it to save his own marriage and relationship with his daghter? This self-improvement guru seems to have his own issues regarding relationships. He has never addressed his failure publicly or it appears within his "Secret Community" (FOW / MD).

Justin Sterling certainly deserves the credit for setting up an elaborate method to make money with little if any meaningful accountability. But he has also caused harm to many relationships.

Copyright © Rick Ross