"High powered lights"

December 2000
By a former member of Sterling's "Family of Women"

I attended the Sterling Weekend many years ago and was involved in its so-called "Family of Women," which at that time had only recently been formed. I was a member for about a year or so after my weekend experience.

The information posted at your site is accurate. But I did not see any information regarding the high powered lights, which were used around the perimeter of the room during the weekend I attended.

During the course of the weekend I attended there came a point when I was becoming quite disoriented. It seemed like I had entered an awake/sleep stage. It was at this point that Justin Sterling became extremely angry with one woman who was wearing sunglasses. He belittled her--screaming at the top of his lungs about her "attitude" and the fact that she was wearing sunglasses. I remember this so clearly, because she answered, "the lights are hurting my eyes!" The thought ran through my mind, what lights? At that moment I woke up and clearly remember looking around the room (for the first time in hours) and realized that there were large lights (like those used in movie productions) beaming down from around the entire perimeter of the room.

A small alarm bell went off in my head at that moment and I resolved to stay alert for the remaining time of the weekend.

The reason I mention this episode is that upon my return from the weekend a few of my friends became interested in my experience and they eventually all went to the weekend too. I asked them a couple of years, after this whole episode of my life was over, if they recalled the lights, but none of them did. I have often wondered if this was some element related to coercive persuasion techniques, which was being used.

My final weeks involved with this group sounded off yet more alarms--some of them were:

While waiting at the airport for a friend to return from the weekend I was standing close to some men from the men's group. They had not noticed me and when the women from the group started arriving in the terminal I heard one of the men say, "Thank God, they've got that look back in their eyes again. Nothing like a weekend to get her back into line."

While attending a Family of Women session led by Justin Sterling in my home town, a woman had the nerve to say that she felt "uncomfortable" about recruiting women who were not ready, or could not afford to take the weekend. Justin screamed at her, "This is not a democracy!"

There were many other incidents. I came to a realization about Sterling, which is--for a group, which preaches about relationships, they actually destroy them [sic]. I also realized that since becoming involved with them I had seen very few of my non-Sterling friends and spent very little time with my family.

I left the group (with no problem) and then spent the next two to three years working to get my friends out!

Due to the schedule and tone of the "Women's Weekend, I would not like to repeat that experience.

I am disturbed to see that this group still exists and that they have upcoming weekends scheduled. In my opinion if anyone from this group asks someone to attend one of their "open houses," or to enroll in their weekend they should say no. That is, do yourself a favor, save your money and just say no!